Sometimes, the Water IS Thicker!

We are all familiar with the saying "Blood is thicker than water".  And, we all know this to mean that the family we are born with is more important than all the other people in our lives.  For a long time, I bought into this idea.  Even when I was a little girl, I believed that my family was the most important family on earth.  I believed that it was my job, up to a certain point, to take care of my little sister.  I'm sure those of you with siblings have experienced this before....I could treat my little sister any way that I wanted to and she had to put up with it.  But nobody else better think that they could treat her badly, or they had to deal with me!

As the years have gone by, I have lost the bond that I once had with my little sister.  We really don't have anything in common, and we don't really associate with one another.  In fact, my mother says that she finally had to accept the fact that she somehow managed to raise two only children under the same roof.  I am sure that my sister would disagree with me, but nothing I have ever done has been good enough for her.  I never had the right job; I never had nice enough things; I didn't marry the right kind of person, and my children were never perfect.

For many years, I have tried to force a relationship to be there, but it hasn't worked.  I used to call my sister a couple of times a month just to talk.  Pretty soon, however, I started to realize that she never picked up the phone to call me.  Eventually, I quit calling, in the hopes that she would notice and actually call me.  That was four or five years ago, and I'm still waiting for her to pick up that phone and call me.

For a very long time, I felt so broken hearted that I didn't have a relationship with my sister.  I still think about the fact that when we lose our mother, it's just the two of us.  I think we are both going to regret not working on a relationship.  But, as time has gone by, I have come to a grudging acceptance that this is my reality with my sister.

Now, to the part where the water can be thicker than the blood.  I have to give a lot of the credit to Facebook....yes, Facebook!  When I first came into the 21st century, thanks to my lovely boys, I started looking for support groups for fibromyalgia and chronic pain.  Lucky for me, I found some wonderful support groups.  Within these groups, I have developed friendships that are closer than my actual relationship with my sister.  These wonderful people have become my family.

I would never try to sit down with my real, blood sister and talk about my disabilities.  On the few times that I have done this, I have been told that if I would start walking miles and miles a day, and drinking gallons of water a day, all of my physical problems would go away.  At first, I tried to explain that my doctor's understood my problems and had told me that this was not the answer to my problems.  Well, these protestations of mine fell on deaf ears.

But with my Facebook family, I can share everything, and I feel safe.  I can tell them that my world is falling apart, and I feel loved.  I can cry that I don't know how I am going to go on, and I am encouraged.  I now have many sisters, and brothers, and I know that I am respected, and that someone thinks I am important.  These wonderful people have shown me that sometimes, water really is thicker than blood.