Living with chronic pain brings on a whole lot of frustration. Having to schedule your life around pain is frustrating; not knowing from day to day if you can do what you need to do is frustrating; having to depend on others for help with simple things is frustrating. I know that, for me, all of these little frustrations can add up very quickly and turn into something else, if I allow that to happen.
I remember the days when I didn't even think about running errands! I remember the days when going to the mall sounded like fun! Now, going to the mall is like being asked to run the gauntlet, and I avoid it at all costs. I have found a way to deal with that frustration, however. Now, I do almost all of my shopping on line! I can spend as much time browsing as I want and I can compare prices easily. Not only that, I can do it all from the comfort of my living room, wearing my pajamas! Can't get much better than that!
I really get frustrated with not being able to make plans in advance. I know that people get frustrated with me because of this, but I hate having to cancel plans at the last minute. I know that I have lost friends because of this. I tell myself that if they can't adjust to being friends with a person with a disability, then they weren't really friends with me to begin with. But knowing this doesn't really take away the sting. Luckily, I have made wonderful friends through an online support group. They are always there for me, and I am always there for them. Knowing that I have someone I can depend on makes this far less frustrating for me!
Right now, I am dealing with feeling frustrated with my own physical limitations. Yesterday, I had to take my son to get a new pair of glasses. In order to get the glasses on the same day, we had to go to an optometrist in another town. It's only about a 30 mile drive, but I was worn out by the time we got there. I spent about 45 minutes on my feet while we looked for the perfect pair of frames.
It takes about an hour and a half to make the glasses, so we had some time to kill. We went to Mickey D's drive through for lunch, and then I decided to run to Walgreens and get my annual flu shot. Just walking from the parking lot to the back of the store nearly did me in! By the time the glasses were ready, and it was time to drive home, I was exhausted and in horrible pain. Luckily, Matt has his permit and was able to drive home. Today, I am really suffering from the pain, and I am completely worn out. I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon, and I just don't know where the energy to get there is going to come from. Needless to say, I am really feeling frustrated about this at the moment!
Life is full frustration, whether we live with chronic pain or not. It's how you handle those frustrations that really matter. Quite often, we can find ways to deal with this. Sometimes it requires thinking outside the box, but there are different ways to do some of the things we want to do. And then, there are other times when there really isn't anything we can do about those frustrations that face us. It's important that we realize that beating ourselves up over it isn't going to solve the problem, or make it go away. We have to face what's going on, and realize that it isn't the end of the world.
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