Heartbreak

As we all know, pain isn't always physical.  Most of us have had some sort of emotional trauma in our lives, and the pain from that is sometimes worse than the physical pain we experience everyday of our lives.  I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, and I have made no secret about it.  I believe that if others, especially children, see that we have nothing to be ashamed of, they will be more comfortable in coming forward and reporting this heinous crime.

Watching all the media coverage of the Jerry Sandusky trial in the last few weeks has brought a lot of those old emotions back, and I have suffered for the victims of his crimes.  I have cried for those boys, and celebrated the fact that they were brave enough to finally come forward and testify against this monster.  And I have cursed Sandusky, and those at Penn State who covered for him all of these years.  The whole thing sickened me!

In my humble opinion, Joe Paterno and the other officials at Penn State University turned a blind eye to what was going on right under their noses.  The reputation of the University, and it's sainted football program, were more important to them that a group of helpless, at risk little boys.  I'm shocked and sickened that not one person lifted a finger to stop the abuse that was happening.  I'm sure if it was one of their children, they would have been screaming it to the rafters, but these little boys who were, for the most part, already troubled, were not important to them.  They hid their heads in the sand in order to pass the buck.

Yesterday, I was looking at the website for one of our local TV stations, and they were asking what the public thought about the fact that they had taken Paterno's "halo" out of the mural on campus.  Most people thought that it was the right thing to do, and that it didn't go far enough.  And others, like me, felt that his statue should be taken down.  I kept reading, and then I came across something that stopped me in my tracks.  A few people were blaming the children and their parents for the whole debacle!

I was absolutely shocked.  One person said that everyone should stop blaming the Penn State officials and Paterno.  She said that if the children had come forward sooner, none of this would have happened!  She also said that it was the parents fault for not making their kids speak up sooner!  I could not believe that anyone would think that way in this day and age, and then I was further shocked that other people agreed with her.

Well, this really got my dander up, as the old saying goes!  I couldn't just sit there and not say something, so I actually wrote about my childhood abuse.  I told them that I was raised in a good home, with lots of love.  I told them that I was taught to tell if someone ever did anything inappropriate to me, and even then, I didn't tell my mother until I was 21 years old.  I explained that these boys were at risk children who had been let down by the adults in their lives over and over, and they probably believed that no one would help them.  I was just so angry.

I've never gone public with my abuse in such a big way.  But, I believe that those of us who have gone through childhood sexual abuse and survived must speak up about it.  We have a responsibility to let today's victims know that they can survive this, and even thrive.  We have to let them know that there is no shame in being a victim.  We have to let them know that nothing that happened to them is their fault.  And we have to let the idiots of the world know how very wrong they are!