Thursday, August 2, 2012

The New Discriminatory "OK"

Discrimination of any kind is wrong.  However, there always seems to be a group of people who are discriminated against that we have a tendency to close our eyes to.  At one time, we closed our eyes to the discrimination against African Americans, and many still turn their heads to discrimination against those whose sexual preference is different from their own.  At the moment, it seems to be OK to discriminate against the handicapped.

Now, those who are visibly disabled are less likely to be openly discriminated against.  However, I know many people who have been confined to wheelchairs who haven't gotten jobs which they were more than qualified for.  We even have laws making it illegal to discriminate against the handicapped.  But that doesn't mean it doesn't happen every single day.

Not long ago, there was a group on Facebook, urging people to actively discriminate against people with handicapped parking permits.  They were even trying to get people to steal the parking permits out of people's cars, and to steal the handicapped parking signs out of parking lots!  I think everyone would probably agree that this is blatantly wrong.

But what about those who discriminate against the handicapped in more subtle ways?  The other day, a friend of mine was running to the grocery store to pick a couple of things up.  She has to use a cane to walk, and frequently has trouble even walking with the cane.  As she got out of her car, in a handicapped parking space, an older man proceeded to stare at her and direct rude comments at her.  She was shocked and hurt, and didn't respond to his obvious disrespect.

I have experienced things like this myself.  At one point, someone loudly said, "If you weren't so fat, you wouldn't need that handicapped spot."  The pain, and shock that I felt at this was overwhelming.  But I didn't respond.  I held my head up and went into the store, but on the inside, I was humiliated.  I have also had to park yards away from a store, because people who were perfectly fine had taken most of the handicapped parking spaces.

When did it become alright to treat people with disabilities in such a shocking manner?  When did we quit treating people with basic human decency?  When I was a little girl, my mother always told me that if I couldn't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all.  I've tried to live by this rule, and I've made sure that my children understand it.  I would never have tolerated rudeness like this when they were little children.  Why do we tolerate it from adults?

I have decided that from now on, I'm going to stand up for myself. If someone feels the need to make a rude comment about my invisible disability, I think I'm going to feel the need to educate them about fibromyalgia, spondylosis, sciatica, and a host of other problems.  If I see someone making comments directed towards others who are disabled, I'm going to stand up to the bully, because that is exactly what they are.  I know that not everyone will feel comfortable with this, but I think it's time that we bring our invisible disabilities out into the light of day.  It's time we let the world know that it is most definitely not OK.

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